Do you ever wonder if another mom in this world is thinking the same as you or going through the same thing as you? Chances are there are several other mothers going through what you’re going through, or feeling what you’re feeling.
You know those feelings of loneliness, guilt, and being overwhelmed? You’re not alone, Mama! I think it’s fair to say that most mom’s out there go through a whirlwind of emotions. First time mom’s, 2nd time mom’s, and mom’s of multiples. It’s tough to be a mom. And for you mom’s doing it all on your own, I honestly don’t know how you survive!? I went a little crazy last night. You see, My boyfriend and I make a great time, a wonderful team! We team up on everything. If I’m cooking, he’s watching her in the living room. If one of us is showering, the other is with Olivia. Everything we do, we do as a team. I honestly don’t give my boyfriend enough credit for how much he helps me. My anxiety and OCD get the best of me at times. He works 10-12 hour shifts and comes home and is dad until Olivia sleeps. I feel very lucky and very fortunate to have his help with everything. The beautiful thing is that he doesn’t see it as helping out or watching our daughter. He just knows it his responsibility as a dad. Just like I know it’s my responsibility as a mom to do all that I do. He’s not a dad who babysits. He’s a dad, period. And he is damn good at it.
But getting back to my point. Last night I had to do everything on my own. And I almost lost it. In that moment I was wishing I had another mom friend who I could just call and be like Girl, I’m losing my shit. Talk to me. Pleeeease. It’s a lonely world being a mom without any close friends.
Before having Olivia, I had my close friends. Some got busy, other’s I guess didn’t want to be friends with a mom. Because they led different lifestyles and I wasn’t about that lifestyle anymore. It hurt to lose these friends. It really did. And if any of them are reading this now. Know that I reached out to y’all several times. And it’s honestly sad that you didn’t want to be a part of my life anymore. But that’s how you realize who your true friends are. With that being said. I have some mom friends. But none that are close, just friends who i catch up with every now and then. And then I have my best friend, but she lives far away and I hardly get to see her. But, I miss her everyday and think about her often. It’s a lonely world some days. I wish I had other mom’s to talk to or to just vent to each other about the daily mom struggles. Someone who understands those crazy emotional roller coasters. Someone who equally would love to enjoy a glass of wine together after our kiddos are sleeping. I miss all of that. I expressed to my boyfriend the other day how lonely I feel at times in this aspect. To go from having friends and people you could call and talk to etc, to not having any of that, has been really hard for me. I understand it happens when you become a mom. But here is where I want to gather all my mom acquaintances and be like can we all just pop open a bottle and pick up some toys around the living room together?
I am here to say that having friends as a mom is a must. We need it to stay sane. We need the little social life. We need to stay strong as women and stay equal. I’m all about uplifting each other. Women judge each other far too much in a world that has enough judgment as it is. Let’s just drink some wine together and share a little laugh. For any mom’s in need of a glass (or bottle) of wine or wanting to do a play date. I am reaching out to you here. Let’s do it.
Mom’s, there is no reason you should ever not have a friend to talk to. It’s the only way we’ll stay sane, after all.
– xo Jovi –
(Originally written on 06.08.2017)